What self-care looks like to me

Self-care is having a major moment right now. I feel like everywhere I turn I see it and it seems to be touted as the solution to a lot of the stress and overwhelm many people experience nowadays.

I’m definitely on board with us taking care of ourselves however we can, but I’ve become increasingly interested in what we seem to think constitutes ‘self-care’. If you were to look at a typical list of self-care techniques it would probably look something like this:

1. Sleep
2. Meditation/Mindfulness
3. Time in nature
4. Long bath (or other similar relaxing activity)
5. Yoga/Exercise
6. Screen-free time

Whilst these are all things that enable self-care and are things I personally practice, I can’t help but feel they are only skin deep and more a set of tools for allowing real self-care to occur.

After all self-care is truly about making sure we are physically and mentally well, and whilst many of the above will absolutely support this, you can meditate daily, run a 5K and relax in a bubble bath but still feel anxious, tense and tired. I think these approaches only work if they are working towards something much deeper; how we treat ourselves. No amount of spa trips will make up for a lack of respect and kindness towards yourself.

With that in mind I’ve put together a short list of things that for me are at the heart of self care. These are the things that I believe actually move the needle with our wellness:

1. Be kind to yourself (if you wouldn’t say it to your best friend, do not say it to yourself)
2. Let go of what you can’t control (do not waste any energy on what is out of your hands)
3. Don’t engage in drama and negativity (yours or other people’s)
4. Speak your truth
5. Listen to your intuition and follow your instinct
6. Don’t be a people pleaser
7. Follow your heart and your dreams
8. Appreciate yourself every day

I’d love to know if this list resonates with you and what things have made the biggest difference to your wellness.